I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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