woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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