I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
it's not cheating when I paid for it
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
