So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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