Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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