sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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