at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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