We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize