I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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