ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
