glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
