Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
