your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
