found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
