hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
