im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
