ugly people sure do ruin things
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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