I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
