i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
