seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
