Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
