That's intense
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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