How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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