So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
