wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
