Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
