How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize