i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
