Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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