I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
