some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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