I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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