I just pynch a tree in the face
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
