Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Sext me about skeletons
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
