you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
