Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Randomize
