I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Randomize
