No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
