My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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