so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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