Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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