hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
