I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
How does one acquire holy water?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
