the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
