He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Even my vagina gasped.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
