No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
