I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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