Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
