Screwed.edu
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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