Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
