I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
