Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
